http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/-t1.htm Seen a funny on the net? or got a joke to make us smile, add it here. Sat, 21 Nov 2009 11:19:54 GMT 10 http://i76.servimg.com/u/f76/13/36/85/95/empty11.gif http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/-t1.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/dont-we-love-children-t1803.htm sj 1. A nursery school pupil told his teacher he'd found a cat, but it was dead. 'How do you know that the cat was dead?' she asked her pupil. 'Because I pissed in its ear and it didn't move,' answered the child innocently. 'You did WHAT?' the teacher exclaimed in surprise. 'You know,' explained the boy, 'I leaned over and went 'Pssst' and it didn't move' 2. A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later.....'Da-ad....' 'What?' 'I'm thirsty. Can ... Funnies and Jokes Sat, 21 Nov 2009 11:19:54 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/dont-we-love-children-t1803.htm#21481 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/dont-we-love-children-t1803.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/very-apt-at-the-moment-t1794.htm Marion Love Story I will seek and find you. I shall take you to bed and have my way with you. I will make you ache, shake & sweat until you moan & groan. I will make you beg for mercy, beg for me to stop. I will exhaust you to the point that you will be relieved when I'm finished with you. And, when I am finished, you will be weak for days. All my love, The Flu Now get your mind out of the gutter and go get your flu jab! Funnies and Jokes Tue, 17 Nov 2009 18:08:20 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/very-apt-at-the-moment-t1794.htm#21328 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/very-apt-at-the-moment-t1794.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/this-should-raise-a-smile-t1785.htm Craftyanny http://link.brightcove.com/services/link/bcpid1529569286/bctid5524339001]]> Funnies and Jokes Mon, 16 Nov 2009 10:09:33 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/this-should-raise-a-smile-t1785.htm#21215 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/this-should-raise-a-smile-t1785.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/tweety-pie-is-60-this-week-t1788.htm Craftyanny


" I TAWT I TAW A PU...........A PUT........OH I DON'T KNOW WAT DA sh** I TAW!!"]]> Funnies and Jokes Mon, 16 Nov 2009 11:28:39 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/tweety-pie-is-60-this-week-t1788.htm#21225 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/tweety-pie-is-60-this-week-t1788.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/its-logical-t1698.htm Marion Two Aussie builders (Phil and Eric) are seated either side of a table in a rough pub when a well-dressed man enters, orders a beer and sits on a stool at the bar. The two builders start to speculate about the occupation of the suit. Phil: - I reckon he's an accountant. Eric: - No way - he's a stockbroker. Phil: - He ain't no stockbroker! A stockbroker wouldn't come in here! The argument repeats itself for some time until the volume of beer gets the better of Phil and he makes ... Funnies and Jokes Sun, 01 Nov 2009 09:10:28 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/its-logical-t1698.htm#19923 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/its-logical-t1698.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/senior-moments-t1738.htm sj An elderly gentleman.... Had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100% The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, 'Your hearing is perfect.. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again.' The gentleman replied, 'Oh, I haven't told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I've ... Funnies and Jokes Fri, 06 Nov 2009 19:21:07 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/senior-moments-t1738.htm#20532 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/senior-moments-t1738.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/senior-moments-2-t1739.htm sj A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, 'You're really doing great, aren't you?'
Morris replied, 'Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.''
The doctor said, 'I didn't say that.. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur; be careful.']]> Funnies and Jokes Fri, 06 Nov 2009 19:25:21 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/senior-moments-2-t1739.htm#20535 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/senior-moments-2-t1739.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/catholic-shampoo-t1680.htm Sunnie While shopping in a food store, two nuns happened to pass by the beer cooler. One nun said to the other, "Wouldn't a nice cool beer or two taste wonderful on a hot summer evening?" The second nun answered "Indeed it would Sister, but I wouldn't feel comfortable buying beer as I am certain that it would cause a scene at the check-out counter." "I can handle that without a problem" she replied as she picked up a six-pack and headed for the check-out. The cashier ... Funnies and Jokes Thu, 29 Oct 2009 12:08:12 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/catholic-shampoo-t1680.htm#19610 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/catholic-shampoo-t1680.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/how-yodelling-began-t1664.htm Marion Many years ago a man was travelling through the mountains of Switzerland Nightfall was rapidly approaching and he had nowhere to sleep.. He went up to a farmhouse and asked the farmer if he could spend the night. The farmer told him that he could sleep in the barn. As the story goes, the farmer's daughter asked her father, "Who is that man going into the barn?" "That fellow travelling through," said the farmer. "needs a place to stay for the night, ... Funnies and Jokes Mon, 26 Oct 2009 17:43:17 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/how-yodelling-began-t1664.htm#19402 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/how-yodelling-began-t1664.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/cruise-ship-t1644.htm Marion DIARY: DAY 1 All packed for the cruise ship -- all my sexiest dresses and make-up. Really excited. DIARY: DAY 2 Entire day at sea, beautiful and saw whales and dolphins. Met the Captain today -- seems like a very nice man. DIARY: DAY 3 At the pool today. Also some shuffle boarding and hit golf balls off the deck. Captain invited me to join him at his table for dinner. Felt honored and had a wonderful time. He is very attractive and attentive. DIARY :DAY 4 Won ... Funnies and Jokes Wed, 21 Oct 2009 11:14:08 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/cruise-ship-t1644.htm#19151 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/cruise-ship-t1644.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/be-quiet-t1645.htm Marion A father and son went hunting together for the first time. The father said: "Stay here and BE VERY QUIET. I'll be across the field." Sometime later the father heard a blood curdling scream and ran back to his son. "What's wrong?" the father asked. "I told you to be quiet." The boy, bless his heart, answered; "Look, I was quiet when the snake slithered across my feet. I was quiet when the bear breathed down my neck. I didn't move ... Funnies and Jokes Wed, 21 Oct 2009 11:18:36 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/be-quiet-t1645.htm#19152 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/be-quiet-t1645.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-sandals-t1624.htm Marion A married couple were on holiday in Jamaica . They were touring around the market-place looking at the goods and such, when they passed a small sandal shop. From inside they heard the shopkeeper with a Jamaican accent say, 'You foreigners! Come in. Come into my humble shop.' So the married couple walked in. The Jamaican said to them, 'I 'ave some special sandals I tink you would beinterested in. Dey makes you wild at sex.' Well, the wife was really interested in buying the sandals ... Funnies and Jokes Fri, 16 Oct 2009 19:44:59 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-sandals-t1624.htm#18891 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-sandals-t1624.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/dictionary-of-medical-terms-for-blondes-t1608.htm Craftyanny Artery - Study of paintings Bacteria - Backdoor to cafeteria Barium - What to do when treatment fails Bowel - Letter like A E I O or U Ceasarean Section - District in Rome Cat Scan - Searching for Kitty Cauterize - Make eye contact with her Colic - Sheep dog Coma - Punctuation mark Congenital - Friendly D & C - Where Washington is Dilate - To live long Enema - Not a friend Fester - Quicker Genital - Non-Jewish Hang Nail - Coat hook Impotent - Distinguished, ... Funnies and Jokes Tue, 13 Oct 2009 11:08:39 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/dictionary-of-medical-terms-for-blondes-t1608.htm#18660 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/dictionary-of-medical-terms-for-blondes-t1608.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/little-johnny-t1609.htm Craftyanny Little April was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through the class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?" When April didn't stir, little Johnny, seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. "GOD ALMIGHTY!" shouted April, and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back to sleep. A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and ... Funnies and Jokes Tue, 13 Oct 2009 11:09:55 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/little-johnny-t1609.htm#18662 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/little-johnny-t1609.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-donkey-t1595.htm Marion Young Paddy moved to Kent and bought a donkey from a farmer for £100. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day. The next day he drove up and said, "Sorry Paddy, but I have some bad news, the donkey died." Paddy replied, "Well, then just give me my money back." The farmer said, "Can't do that. I went and spent it already." Paddy said, "Ok, then, just bring me the dead donkey." The farmer asked, "What are you going ... Funnies and Jokes Sun, 11 Oct 2009 07:56:47 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-donkey-t1595.htm#18517 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-donkey-t1595.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-priest-t1596.htm Marion A distinguished young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, 'Father, may I ask a favour?' 'Of course child. What may I do for you?' 'Well, I bought an expensive woman's electronic hair dryer for my Mother's birthday that is unopened and well over the Customs limits, and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through customs for me? Under your robes perhaps?' 'I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you: I will not ... Funnies and Jokes Sun, 11 Oct 2009 07:58:22 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-priest-t1596.htm#18518 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-priest-t1596.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/golf-balls-t1587.htm sj A man entered the bus with both of his front pockets full of golf balls and sat down next to a beautiful blonde. The puzzled blonde kept looking at him and his bulging pockets. Finally, after many such glances from her, he said, "It's golf balls............" Nevertheless, the blonde continued to look at him for a very long time, deeply thinking about what he had said. After several minutes, not being able to contain her curiosity any longer, she asked, "Does it hurt ... Funnies and Jokes Fri, 09 Oct 2009 16:50:17 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/golf-balls-t1587.htm#18427 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/golf-balls-t1587.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-young-couple-t1578.htm Marion A young couple wanted to join the church, the vicar told them, 'We have a special requirement for new member couples. You must abstain from physical relations with each other for one whole month.' The couple agreed, but after two-and-a-half weeks returned to the Church.. When the vicar ushered them into his office, the wife was crying and the husband was obviously very depressed. 'You are back so soon...Is there a problem?' the vicar inquired. 'We are terribly ashamed to admit ... Funnies and Jokes Wed, 07 Oct 2009 16:18:07 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-young-couple-t1578.htm#18313 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-young-couple-t1578.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/irish-diesel-fitter-t1520.htm Marion Paddy and Mick were both laid off, so they went to the unemployment office. When asked his occupation, Paddy answered, 'Knicker Stitcher.. I sew da elastic onto ladies' knickers and thongs.' The clerk looked up Knicker Stitcher on his computer and, finding it classified as unskilled labour, he gave him £80 a week unemployment pay. Mick was next in and when asked his occupation replied, 'Diesel Fitter.' Since a diesel fitter was a skilled job, the clerk gave Mick £160 ... Funnies and Jokes Sun, 20 Sep 2009 17:01:53 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/irish-diesel-fitter-t1520.htm#17548 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/irish-diesel-fitter-t1520.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/blonde-car-accident-t1518.htm Parchie Georgie One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde started laughing. This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield. This time the blonde laughed even harder. Livid, ... Funnies and Jokes Sat, 19 Sep 2009 18:44:18 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/blonde-car-accident-t1518.htm#17499 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/blonde-car-accident-t1518.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/xxxxx-t1511.htm Marion
It doesn't enhance your sexual performance but

it does stop your biscuit going soft.]]> Funnies and Jokes Fri, 18 Sep 2009 12:55:10 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/xxxxx-t1511.htm#17404 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/xxxxx-t1511.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-images-of-mother-how-true-t1496.htm Marion 4 YEARS OF AGE - My Mummy can do anything! 8 YEARS OF AGE - My Mum knows a lot! A whole lot! 12 YEARS OF AGE - My Mother doesn't really know quite everything. 14 YEARS OF AGE - Naturally, Mother doesn't know that, either. 16 YEARS OF AGE - Mother? She's hopelessly old-fashioned. 18 YEARS OF AGE - That old woman? She's way out of date! 25 YEARS OF AGE - Well, she might know a little bit about it! 35 YEARS OF AGE - Before we decide, let's get Mum's opinion. 45 ... Funnies and Jokes Mon, 14 Sep 2009 20:08:49 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-images-of-mother-how-true-t1496.htm#17227 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-images-of-mother-how-true-t1496.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/pure-logic-scottish-humour-t1492.htm Marion Two Aberdonian farmers, Tam and Rab, are sitting in the Farmers bar drinking beer. Tam turns to Rab and says, "Ye ken fit? I'm tired o'gan through life athoot an education.. I'morn, I think I'll go doon to the squeel and sign up for some nicht classes." Rab thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave. The next day Tam goes down to the school and meets the Lecturer, who signshim up for the four basic classes: Maths, English, History, and Logic." Logic?" Tam ... Funnies and Jokes Mon, 14 Sep 2009 14:38:13 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/pure-logic-scottish-humour-t1492.htm#17177 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/pure-logic-scottish-humour-t1492.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-stud-rooster-t1498.htm Marion A farmer went out one day and bought a brand new stud rooster for his chicken coop.. The new rooster struts over to the old rooster and says, 'OK old fart, time for you to retire.' The old rooster replies, 'Come on, surely you cannot handle ALL of these chickens. Look what it has done to me Can't you just let me have the two old hens over in the corner?' The young rooster says, 'Beat it: You are washed up and I am taking over.' The old rooster says, 'I tell you ... Funnies and Jokes Mon, 14 Sep 2009 20:18:56 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-stud-rooster-t1498.htm#17232 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-stud-rooster-t1498.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/buttercups-and-golf-balls-t1497.htm Marion Towards the end of the golf course, Tom hit his ball into the woods and found it in a patch of pretty yellow buttercups. Trying to get his ball back in play, he ended up thrashing just about every buttercup in the patch.. All of a sudden . . . POOF!! In a flash and puff of smoke, a little old woman appeared. She said, "I'm Mother Nature!" "Do you know how long it took me to make those buttercups?" "Just for doing what you have done, you won't have ... Funnies and Jokes Mon, 14 Sep 2009 20:11:42 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/buttercups-and-golf-balls-t1497.htm#17230 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/buttercups-and-golf-balls-t1497.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-dogs-t1419.htm Marion Three dogs are sitting in the waiting room at the vet's when they strike up a conversation. The black Lab turns to the chocolate Lab and says, "So why are you here?" The brown Lab replies, "I'm a pisser. I piss on everything....the sofa, the curtains, the cat, the kids. But the final straw was last night when I pissed in the middle of my owner's bed." The black Lab says, "So what is the vet going to do?" "Gonna cut my nuts off," ... Funnies and Jokes Fri, 28 Aug 2009 12:52:09 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-dogs-t1419.htm#16234 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-dogs-t1419.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-soldier-and-the-nun-t1405.htm Marion A soldier ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, 'Please, may I hide under your skirt. I'll explain later.' The nun agreed. A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, Sister, have you seen a soldier?' The nun replied, 'He went that way.' After the MPs ran off, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt and said, 'I can't thank you enough Sister. You see, I don't want to go to Afghanistan ' The nun said, 'I understand completely.' The ... Funnies and Jokes Wed, 26 Aug 2009 10:54:10 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-soldier-and-the-nun-t1405.htm#16087 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-soldier-and-the-nun-t1405.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/eggs-for-breakfast-t1396.htm Marion We went to breakfast at a restaurant where the 'Seniors' Special was two eggs, bacon, hash browns and toast for £1.99. 'Sounds good,' my wife said. 'But I don't want the eggs.' 'Then, I'll have to charge you two pounds and forty-nine pence because you're ordering a la carte,' the waitress warned her.. 'You mean I'd have to pay for not taking the eggs?' my wife asked incredulously. 'YES!!' stated the waitress. 'I'll take the special then.' my wife said. 'How ... Funnies and Jokes Tue, 25 Aug 2009 09:07:56 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/eggs-for-breakfast-t1396.htm#15980 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/eggs-for-breakfast-t1396.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/flat-tyre-t1378.htm Marion Yesterday I had a flat tyre on the highway. So I eased my car over to the shoulder of the road, carefully get out of the car and open the trunk.. I took out 2 cardboard men, unfolded them and stood them at the rear of my car facing oncoming traffic. They look so life like you wouldn't believe it! They are in trench coats exposing their nude bodies to the approaching drivers. To my surprise, cars start slowing down looking at my lifelike men which made it safer for me to work at ... Funnies and Jokes Fri, 21 Aug 2009 09:24:24 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/flat-tyre-t1378.htm#15721 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/flat-tyre-t1378.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/sick-leave-t1374.htm sj I urgently needed a few days off work, but, I knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave. I thought that maybe if I acted ‘Crazy’ then he would tell me to take a few days off. So, I hung upside-down on the ceiling and made funny noises. My co-worker asked me what I was doing. I told her that I was pretending to be a light bulb, so that the Boss might think I was ‘Crazy’ and give me a few days off. A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and asked, “What in ... Funnies and Jokes Thu, 20 Aug 2009 11:17:10 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/sick-leave-t1374.htm#15683 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/sick-leave-t1374.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/whats-in-a-name-t1361.htm sparkles A woman arrived at a party and while scanning the guests, spotted an attractive man standing alone. She approached him, smiled and said, "Hello. My name is Carmen." "That's a beautiful name," he replied. "Is it a family name?" "No," she replied. As a matter of fact I gave it to myself. It represents the two things that I enjoy most - cars and men. Therefore, I chose "Carmen." What's your name?" ... Funnies and Jokes Mon, 17 Aug 2009 19:57:19 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/whats-in-a-name-t1361.htm#15519 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/whats-in-a-name-t1361.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/don-t-argue-with-your-dad-t1356.htm Marion A teenage boy had just got his driver's license and inquired of his father as to when they could discuss his use of the car. His father said he'd make a deal with his son: 'You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little, and get your hair cut. Then we'll talk about the car.' The boy thought about that for a moment, decided he'd settle for the offer, and they agreed on it. After about six weeks his father said, 'Son, you've brought your grades ... Funnies and Jokes Mon, 17 Aug 2009 07:28:30 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/don-t-argue-with-your-dad-t1356.htm#15446 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/don-t-argue-with-your-dad-t1356.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/apartment-for-rent-t1347.htm Craftyanny just got this in an email Posted - 13 August 2009 : 07:58:43 Show Profile Email Poster Edit Topic Reply with Quote View user's IP address Delete Topic A businessman met a beautiful girl and agreed to spend the night with her for $500. They did their thing, Before he left, he told her that he did not have any cash with him, but he would have his secretary write a cheque and mail it to her, calling the payment 'RENT FOR APARTMENT.' On the way to the office, he regretted ... Funnies and Jokes Sat, 15 Aug 2009 20:00:14 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/apartment-for-rent-t1347.htm#15317 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/apartment-for-rent-t1347.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/country-song-t1328.htm scn http://jbreck.com/itsshardtokiss.html]]> Funnies and Jokes Thu, 13 Aug 2009 20:15:50 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/country-song-t1328.htm#15156 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/country-song-t1328.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/what-an-entrance-t1325.htm Craftyanny http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-94JhLEiN0&feature=player_embedded]]> Funnies and Jokes Wed, 12 Aug 2009 09:34:06 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/what-an-entrance-t1325.htm#15105 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/what-an-entrance-t1325.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-lost-bagpiper-t1316.htm Marion As a bagpiper, I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man who had no family or friends. The funeral was to be held at a cemetery in the remote countryside and this man would be the first to be laid to rest there. As I was not familiar with the backwoods area, I became lost and being a typical man, did not stop for directions. I finally arrived an hour late. I saw the backhoe and the crew who were eating lunch but the hearse was ... Funnies and Jokes Tue, 11 Aug 2009 11:03:57 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-lost-bagpiper-t1316.htm#15032 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-lost-bagpiper-t1316.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-buses-t1312.htm sj : buses Mick and Paddy were walking home from the pub. Mick says to Paddy, 'I can't be bothered to walk all dat way.' 'I know,' says Paddy, 'but we've no money for a cab and we've missed the last bus home.' 'We could steal a bus from the depot,' Mick suggests. They arrive at the bus depot and Mick tells Paddy to go in and get a bus while he keeps a look-out. After shuffling around for ages, Mick shouts, 'Paddy, what are you doing? Have you not found one yet?' Paddy ... Funnies and Jokes Mon, 10 Aug 2009 20:51:57 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-buses-t1312.htm#14996 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/the-buses-t1312.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/how-to-stop-church-gossip-t1302.htm scn SUBJECT: How to Stop Church Gossip Mildred, the church gossip, and self-appointed Monitor of the church's morals, kept sticking Her nose into other people's business.. Several members did not approve of her Extra curricular activities , but feared her Enough to maintain their silence.. She made a mistake, however, when she ... Funnies and Jokes Sun, 09 Aug 2009 21:01:48 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/how-to-stop-church-gossip-t1302.htm#14917 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/how-to-stop-church-gossip-t1302.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/mother-of-the-year-t1297.htm scn After they got settled in their seats a woman sitting across the aisle from her leaned over and asked, "Are all of those kids yours?"
She replied, "No. I work for a condom company. These are customer complaints."

Wish I could think so quickly.]]> Funnies and Jokes Sun, 09 Aug 2009 17:24:29 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/mother-of-the-year-t1297.htm#14883 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/mother-of-the-year-t1297.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/thought-u-like-this-t1281.htm sj For all of you in education, with sons, grandsons, or who just love the things little kids say ~ a reminder that adult words are often taken literally..... 'Circumcised' A teacher noticed that a little boy at the back of the class was squirming around, scratching his crotch, and not paying attention. She went back to find out what was going on. He was quite embarrassed and whispered that he had just recently been circumcised and he was quite itchy. The teacher told him ... Funnies and Jokes Thu, 06 Aug 2009 09:26:12 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/thought-u-like-this-t1281.htm#14737 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/thought-u-like-this-t1281.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/evian-babies-t1242.htm Craftyanny
http://s678.photobucket.com/albums/vv146/HobbyCrafters/jokies%20and%20funnies/?action=view&current=Todays_Babies_by_Evian.flv]]> Funnies and Jokes Wed, 29 Jul 2009 19:05:56 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/evian-babies-t1242.htm#14166 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/evian-babies-t1242.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/sunburn-t1195.htm Marion A guy fell asleep on the beach for several hours and got horrible sunburn, specifically to his upper legs. He went to the hospital, and was promptly admitted after being diagnosed with second-degree burns. With his skin already starting to blister, and the severe pain he was in, the doctor prescribed continuous intravenous feeding with saline, electrolytes, a sedative, and a xxxxx pill every four hours. The nurse, who was rather astounded, asked, 'What good will xxxxx do for ... Funnies and Jokes Mon, 20 Jul 2009 16:36:30 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/sunburn-t1195.htm#13467 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/sunburn-t1195.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/taking-dad-shopping-t1202.htm sparkles I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes (he is 84). We decided to grab a bite at the food court. I noticed he was watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colours: green, red, orange, and blue. ... Funnies and Jokes Wed, 22 Jul 2009 09:47:13 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/taking-dad-shopping-t1202.htm#13577 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/taking-dad-shopping-t1202.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/a-load-of-old-irish-lol-t1212.htm Marion Paddy & Mick go to London to donate sperm. It was a disaster! Paddy missed the tube & Mick came on the bus!! **************** A Muslim was sitting next to Paddy on a plane. Paddy odered a whiskey. The stewardess asked the Muslim if he'd like a drink. He replied in disgust 'I'd rather be raped by a dozen whores than let liquor touch my lips!' Paddy handed his drink back & said 'Me too, I didnt know we had a choice!' ... Funnies and Jokes Thu, 23 Jul 2009 19:29:48 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/a-load-of-old-irish-lol-t1212.htm#13689 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/a-load-of-old-irish-lol-t1212.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/blonde-joke-t1209.htm sparkles An Australian blonde was sent on her way to Heaven. Upon her arrival, a concerned St Peter met her at the Pearly Gates. "I'm sorry," St Peter said; "But Heaven is suffering from an overload of goodly souls and we have been forced to put up an Entrance Exam for new arrivals to ease the burden of Heavenly Arrivals." "That's cool" said the blonde, "What does the Entrance Exam consist of?" "Just three questions" said St ... Funnies and Jokes Thu, 23 Jul 2009 08:32:09 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/blonde-joke-t1209.htm#13635 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/blonde-joke-t1209.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/senior-church-moment-t1203.htm sparkles A preacher was explaining that he must move on to a larger congregation that will pay him more. There is a hush within the congregation --- as no one wanted him to leave. Then Joe Smith, who owns several car dealerships in the city, stood up and proclaimed ... 'If the Preacher stays, I will provide him with a new Cadillac every year, and his wife with a Honda mini-van to transport their children!' The congregation ... Funnies and Jokes Wed, 22 Jul 2009 09:48:31 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/senior-church-moment-t1203.htm#13578 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/senior-church-moment-t1203.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/green-pink-yellow-t1204.htm sparkles Mujibar was trying to get a job in India. The Personnel Manager said, 'Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, except one. Unless you pass it , you cannot qualify for this job.' Mujibar said, 'I am ready.' The manager said, 'Make a sentence using the words [b]Yellow,[/b] [b]Pink,[/b] and [b]Green[/b] ... Funnies and Jokes Wed, 22 Jul 2009 09:49:52 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/green-pink-yellow-t1204.htm#13579 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/green-pink-yellow-t1204.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/little-susie-not-me-t1176.htm SusieD
Mum said, "You should say "No" -they only want to look at your knickers."

Susie said, "I know they do.

That's why I hide them in my bag"!]]> Funnies and Jokes Sat, 18 Jul 2009 07:18:32 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/little-susie-not-me-t1176.htm#13234 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/little-susie-not-me-t1176.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/mongolian-vd-t1184.htm sparkles [b]An American tourist goes on a trip to China .[/b][b] [/b] [b]While in China , he is very sexually promiscuous [/b] [b]and does not use a condom at all.[/b][b] [b][b] A week after arriving back home in the States, he wakes[/b] [b] one morning to find his penis covered with bright green [/b][/b][/b] [b] and purple bumps.[/b][b] [b][b] Horrified, he immediately goes to see a doctor. The[/b] [b] doctor, never having seen anything like it, orders [/b][/b][/b] ... Funnies and Jokes Sun, 19 Jul 2009 17:10:01 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/mongolian-vd-t1184.htm#13352 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/mongolian-vd-t1184.htm http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/i-ain-t-sniffing-those-t1182.htm Craftyanny ]]> Funnies and Jokes Sun, 19 Jul 2009 15:07:14 GMT http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/i-ain-t-sniffing-those-t1182.htm#13342 http://hobbycrafter.heavenforum.com/funnies-and-jokes-f12/i-ain-t-sniffing-those-t1182.htm